Or what drives people to therapy? From my perspective, we can divide the answer into 3 major categories:
1. Pain – physical and Suffering – emotional. The greater the suffering, the easier to hypnotized/ work with. The person is really engaged to get rid of the pain/suffering; they will try anything, to move in the comfortable area. The desire is sometimes enough for the healing of that person. So “convince me you suffer enough! If so, let’s get to work!”
2. Existential frustration. This is the time when we ask ourselves the purpose of life, who I am, what am I doing here, etc. This is a great moment, when people are curios, they read, they research, and they don’t stop until they get the answers to their question. It is a driving force, which puts in motion the energy to discover who we truly are and what our mission is. The Choice theory, written by W. Glasser, states that:
· all we do is behave
· almost all behavior is chosen
· we are driven by our genes to satisfy five basic needs: survival, love and belonging, power, freedom and fun.
We all make choices according to basic needs that come from within ourselves. The needs drive our choices and influence how we behave in those choices. The most important thing, in Glasser’s vision is to choose a purpose. In order for that purpose to really work, it has to contribute to someone else life.
We need each other and I believe that the cause of almost all psychological symptoms is our inability to get along with the important people in our lives and with ourselves!
3. Psychic boredom. This person sense that they have untapped resources. Is the type of person who has everything they desired – a good job, house, car, the spouse is great, beautiful children, everything is perfect, except the fact that they feel empty inside. And they come and ask the therapist “Why do I feel empty, if I have everything?” We have these beliefs, created by society that if we have a house, a car, a spouse and children, then our life is perfect and we will feel happy. Sometimes, we waste a life time to achieve these things, and we end up feeling empty in the end, without knowing what really makes us happy. Just ask yourself, what makes you happy? When is the last time you took time, to think and feel about what makes you happy? There are 6 senses that will always give us the answers that we need. And yes, those answers are given by the person who knows you better than anyone: YOU! You feel, you see, you hear, you taste, you sense and you know what makes you happy! None of these 6 senses are better than the other one. All of them create that wholeness that you looking for.
Or sometimes, we don’t know how to name an emotion. That’s right! I met a lot of people in my practice, and when I ask them what you feel right now, they are not able to articulate what they feel. That does not mean they don’t feel, but they do not have in their vocabulary a name for that sensation, for that emotion, for that feeling and so on. And that is because nobody teaches that in school. Unless you study psychology! The society forms a model of a human being, that doesn’t need to think about his emotions, his sensations, his feelings. They only have to do things, to achieve things, to achieve success. And success means to have the perfect job, the perfect car, the greatest house with the latest technology.
What if, success means to know YOU? To know your deepest fears but also to know your strongest points. What if success means to overcome your fears and to learn to communicate with the loved ones? What if success means to learn how to speak with your child and to encourage him for this great journey called Life? What if success means how to learn to love yourself?
This is what should drive us to go to therapy! This is why we should go to therapist, psychotherapy, hypnotherapy, light therapy, sound therapy, and any kind of therapy that suit the being that you are!
In joy and light, I wish you to be ready for change!